Alright, I will admit it. I was bored and lacking some motivation. I was trying to determine what I wanted to blog about. This led my mind to wandering and my thoughts went to Google. I have had some weird search terms that lead people to my site, so I decided to look up something weird and see where it would lead me.
I suppose I should have expected something strange when I looked up “Donkey Love”, but I wasn’t expecting to find a guy that was eating some goat testicles to survive. However, I found that and a whole lot more. This is one of those things that I just have to share because it’s just baffling.
I don’t know about you, but older country bandmates with erectile dysfunction just set my world on fire! I have no clue who did this marketing campaign, but they have some serious issues. They are laughable because while some guys do sit around talking about sex, I don’t know too many who talk about the lack of dick action they are getting, much less sing songs about it.
In case you haven’t seen this interesting bit of television history I have added the video for your viewing enjoyment.
Receiving a sex toy with Sue Johanson’s name and face on the box can immediately initiate a giggle or two. I’ve watched her show before and I think she offers great advice. For some reason though, it always makes me laugh that someone that might be considered elderly is the sex goddess of national television.
Still, if she has what it takes and it appears she does, then more power to her. I am sure that I have tried out some of her recommendations in the past, but this is the first one that comes with her bona fide seal of approval. So, naturally I was more than excited to try it out.
I will admit it, when I receive toys for review I am like a kid at Christmastime. I rip open the package and hope that there is time for me to test them out, right that second (any excuse for sex, right?). Some days I am able to whip them out and determine if the magic is there and other days I have to wait. With the Royal Ripple, I got lucky, and when I say that I mean in more ways than one.
When I first went to try this out, I discovered that the toy would need two AA batteries. This would be fine if I had any, but I was all out. Being the resourceful, pseudo-slut I can sometimes be, I reached for the remote just to get an idea if half-strength batteries would show that this toy was worth using more than once. I turned it on with a twist of the knob and held it to my hand. I considered the strength for a moment, and then asked my boyfriend what he thought. We both concluded that it was of decent power for having batteries that were not full strength and proceeded to get into testing it out.
I woke up and could not sleep. I watched you lay there, sleeping soundly and could not get the thought of you out of my mind. Maybe it was the fact that you were next to me, but I don’t think that was it. I think that it probably was that I woke up because I was thinking of you. Instinctively, I reached down and slid my hand in my panties to find that I was soaking wet.
I might not have been able to remember my dreams, but I certainly could figure out what they were about. I knew I had to do something or else I might never get these thoughts out of my head. So, I did the only thing I could do. I slid down, under the covers, making sure not to wake you. Well…at least not yet.
I slid my hand in your boxers to find a raging hard-on and I couldn’t help but grin. My tongue flickered over my lips at the thought of your hard cock in my mouth. I had to hold back the whimper of pleasure that it would have brought to my lips, because I didn’t want to wake you. Holding your cock in my hand, fingers gingerly wrapped around you. I let my fingers stroke slowly at first. I wanted you to begin to feel the pleasure, but not feel it enough to wake you.
As your cock became harder, I moved in, lowering my head to flick my tongue over your hardened flesh. My pert, wet tongue slid surreptitiously over your cock from shaft to tip. I licked it like a greedy little girl might lick a lollipop. The only difference was that you were my lollipop and this greedy little girl wanted to enjoy every second of her sweet treat. I knew just when I wanted you to wake up, so I made sure to make all the right moves. Your groans and slightly sleepy movements told me that I was right on track with where I wanted to be.
After what seemed like ages, but was not much more than a few tempting minutes, I finally indulged myself by sliding my warm, waiting lips around your cock. A moan sent vibrations through your flesh as I simply could not contain the pleasure of the taste of you. My lips moved down, halfway around your large shaft before dragging back up and off your cock. I listened for a minute before continuing. I could feel your breath picking up, a growl leaving your lips as you felt the warmth on the flesh of your throbbing cock.
I have been shopping at Adam and Eve for quite some time now, but for those of you that haven’t I have quite an offer for you! This offer is especially great for those of you that are new to the toy and adult sex play scene.
When I first started buying toys I went through a period where I didn’t know what to buy or what was even worth buying. That doubt went away eventually (being a reviewer certainly didn’t hurt) and I became familiar with the stores worth shopping at and the ones that were meant to be avoided.
If you’re looking for a store and you don’t know who to trust or what’s worth buying, Adam and Eve wants to help you out. They also want to welcome you to the world of toys. All new customers at Adam and Eve will receive a free sample, Starter Kit. The kit includes quite a few standard items that will get you started on the road to your very own kinky toy box.
The Edge - a sizzling hot XXX DVD
A Vibrator – This one is a Customer Favorite!
Adam and Eve Thin Lube – Made Especially for those Smooth Strokes
Tasty Lovin’ gel – Perfect for some Sensual Tongue Play
Plus, a sample pack of A&E’s best-selling condoms!
Looking at the sleek, slim design of the Hummingbird, I have to admit I wasn’t imagining anything remotely positive when it came to the thought of having an orgasm with it. The Hummingbird is much thinner than your average vibrator. All in all, it’s bigger than a pencil, but not much. There are a lot of sensory options here that people will love. The shaft has thorns running up and down because it resembles a flower stalk with the end tip being a flowery blossom. On the side, the vibrator sports a hummingbird (hence the name), which is in the rabbit-style that so many people are fond of in their vibrators.
One of my favorite parts of this toy was the aesthetic value. The bright purple and green of this toy just work so well together. With the average toy colors matching some flesh color in some way, this one just stands out from the pack. Obviously, it needs a hook and in many ways it seems that hook is all about the looks of this small wonder.
It’s important to note that this is not recommended as your main toy. By that I mean that it is encouraged that this is used as a side/occasional toy and that you own others, as well. Backups are always important because they allow you to choose the kind of sex or orgasm you are interested in. With one, you end up in that monotonous space that won’t do you any good. Having a couple gives you options and that’s something that everyone needs.
The Hummingbird would be a fabulous foreplay toy for couples that are more timid about their toy choices. The problem with using this as your main orgasm source is that before you get to the mind blowing final event, the feeling will fizzle out. It’s a frustration toy. It does a hell of a nice job getting you in the mood, but since there is no orgasm and you just sit on the brink, you’re more likely to want to throw it against the wall at some point. However, using it in couples play gives you the chance to take what it does best and then add in a whole lot more after you’ve used this toy for its purpose. The goal with the Hummingbird is to know how to use it. It’s not a bad toy, but if you’re depending on it for all things sex-oriented you will be let down.
Another thing that struck me about the size of this toy was that it would be a nice choice for adjusting to anal penetration. It’s small enough to allow people the pleasure of learning anal, but not so big to scare them away from it. The same can also be said for double penetration. If you’ve been looking for a way to try it, but have been nervous, this would be the perfect toy to test things out. After all, the Hummingbird is only one inch in width so it’s not a very intimidating toy in that respect.
When you think of a hot sex romp you don’t think three minutes. Hell, if you’re like most you might even laugh at the idea and spout minute man jokes. That being said, a group of polled sex therapists have said that this is the optimal time for good sexual intercourse to occur. The findings are set to be published in the May issue of the Journal of Sexual Medicine.
I think that this is going to be a hard pill to swallow for a lot of people. Everyone I know likes to think that someone else’s sex life is probably better than theirs is. Between those thoughts and the miracle men of hour-long porno fame, there are a lot of people that will be feeling insignificant in the bedroom.
There really is no need for this though. In all honesty, sex should not be measured in minutes or even orgasms. Good sex offers you what you are looking for, be it a good time, physical intimacy, or just the ability to get off. If this takes five minutes or three hours it doesn’t really matter. If you’re truly worried about time you can always add in some foreplay or a little oral action and before you know it, you’re hitting a larger block of time.
I am so not sure what to think of this advertisement. The idea is to get people to eat more fruits and vegetables. The ad is Danish. As you can see it’s trying to promote inter-veggie mingling. I don’t know if it’s their way of trying to get us to eat more California Blend or what, but it’s certainly interesting nonetheless.
I don’t know that this would get me to eat more vegetables though. The idea of broccoli having tits scares me in some weird way. I can just see myself having nightmares after this. I will be imagining the seedless cucumber invading the head of lettuce and all sorts of weird shit. And it’s all thanks to this ad.
What do you think? Is this making you hungry for some zucchini? I think the vegetable fetishists might like it in that kinky sort of way. So, if this is being used as a metaphor for eating your vegetables (wink, wink) then it might work, but otherwise…I’m just not sold.
I don’t know about you, but I love my Wii. Sadly, I don’t get to play it as much as I would like, but I love it and it knows that I do. We have our private time when we can, but this time usually is cut short for more important things like sex, work, sleep, sex, and food. However, now one of these things may work with the Wii all thanks to a brand new game that may be coming out on the market.
A few years back this company by the name of Peekaboo Pole Dancing came out with the Electra Pole. This pole would give you a chance to pole dance like Carmen Electra in your own home. I’ve never tried one so I’m not about to comment about the idea. Currently, my home has no spot for a spare pole, so I’m just out of luck. However, this company is moving things in a more interesting direction with the idea of creating a video game that will allow you to pole dance (pole will be included) for the Nintendo Wii.
dbTechno reports that Peekaboo is looking for the right partner to help them bring their idea to Wii. Gamers would get the chance to shake their ass and do other sexy maneuvers. This game would fit in interestingly among the Wii Fit games that have helped people to get more exercise and lose a little weight.
Kendra Wilkinson is known for a couple of things. She is the dippiest of Hugh Hefner’s girls and…well…she’s one of Hugh Hefner’s girls. For now, I imagine that’s enough to be known for and even if it’s not, it’s still not so bad. Kendra and the other girls are living the high life, able to have just about whatever they want. They can have their choice of food, drink, and anything else. Of course, when it comes to food Kendra loves Olive Garden. It’s been said that Olive Garden is Kendra’s favorite restaurant ever.
To prove how much she loves Olive Garden, Playboy is having an Olive Garden pictorial with the girls (servers) from Olive Garden. Kendra will be picking the final talent to have a shot at being in the magazine. As you might have guessed there are some rules, other than working at Olive Garden, for you to be an option in this little shot at Playboy stardom.
The rules include:
To be considered, you must submit the following:
At least two photos: one head shot and one full-body shot (bikini or nude)
A recent pay stub showing proof of current employment at Olive Garden
A clear and legible photocopy of a government-issued photo ID proving you are 18 or older
You also have to fill out some releases and add some additional info about yourself. You can find all that info out on the link above.
Receiving a sex toy with Sue Johanson’s name and face on the box can immediately initiate a giggle or two. I’ve watched her show before and I think she offers great advice. For some reason though, it always makes me laugh that someone that might be considered elderly is the sex goddess of national television.
I have been shopping at Adam and Eve for quite some time now, but for those of you that haven’t I have quite an offer for you! This offer is especially great for those of you that are new to the toy and adult sex play scene.
Looking at the sleek, slim design of the 
I am so not sure what to think of this advertisement. The idea is to get people to eat more fruits and vegetables. The ad is Danish. As you can see it’s trying to promote inter-veggie mingling. I don’t know if it’s their way of trying to get us to eat more California Blend or what, but it’s certainly interesting nonetheless.
Kendra Wilkinson is known for a couple of things. She is the dippiest of Hugh Hefner’s girls and…well…she’s one of Hugh Hefner’s girls. For now, I imagine that’s enough to be known for and even if it’s not, it’s still not so bad. Kendra and the other girls are living the high life, able to have just about whatever they want. They can have their choice of food, drink, and anything else. Of course, when it comes to food Kendra loves Olive Garden. It’s been said that Olive Garden is Kendra’s favorite restaurant ever.
